Mediation is more than just what goes on between the interests, groups, sides or rooms. It is more than the sharing, real negotiation, posturing and debate. It includes what goes on within each room. And perhaps that is the most valuable part of the entire mediation.
Those things that go on “in the other room” are perhaps those things that you think should have happened before the mediation. It may not be possible before, however. It may be influenced by what you share and it may not be possible until the mediation. And it may need to happen after the difficult or preliminary mediation conference.
What is going on “over there” may require time and space. It can involve deep-seated sensibilities about self-worth, psychology and needs, among other things. Be patient and do not assume the worst when things seem to not be going anywhere for a while. When you are wondering what’s going on over there, they are probably wondering the same thing about you.
Keep an eye out for our upcoming series of videos that will explain the inner workings of mediation for young attorneys -- or any attorney who wants to brush up on mediation advocacy. We collaborated with The Florida Bar Young Lawyers Division on six advice-filled segments. The first, featuring fellow UWWM mediator Sandra Upchurch and Daytona Beach attorney Katherine Hurst Miller of Cobb Cole, P.A., will be posted to our home page by mid-morning tomorrow. In addition to explaining what might be happening in "the other room," these initial videos explore opening comments, preparing your client (and the mediator), and anchoring and bracketing in negotiation.
The easiest way to keep up with the series is to subscribe to our YouTube channel at www.youtube.com/user/UWWMMediation.